(1) Vornado EH1-0039-06 Soleaire Personal Foot Heater
Description: (click show to see it)
"What? What are you talking about?"
"My foot! Frostbite is setting in, I can feel it! Where's the Vornado Soleaire Personal Foot Heater?"
"It's in the bathroom closet, but... frostbite? It's like 45 degrees outside. And you were only out for, what, 10 minutes? How long does it take to fold up the patio umbrella and stack up the chairs?"
"Long enough for my foot to get really, really cold! Only the Soleaire's revitalizing warmth and passive-massage bumps can possibly save that pinky toe! The situation is critical!"
"Here it is. But I think you're overreacting again. It's like that time you thought you got a concussion from 'walking too hard.' Or when you were convinced that glob of spaghetti sauce on your arm was melanoma."
"Will you ever let me live that down? A few thousand dollars in unnecessary radiology procedures and I'm branded a hypochondriac for life. Ahhh, that Vornado Soleaire Personal Foot Heater seems to be doing the trick. The feeling's coming back in that toe. I don't want to start celebrating yet, but it looks like amputation won't be necessary."
"What a miracle. So did you put the umbrella in the garage or the basem-"
"AAAGHHH! Ow! Help! Help!"
"What? What's wrong? Is it your foot again?"
"Yes! I burned it on that Vornado Soleaire Personal Foot Heater! Like, fourth or fifth-degree burns, I bet! If I don't get medical attention I might lose the pinky toe!"
"Sigh...I'm thinking about losing something myself."
Warranty:3 Year Vornado
Electric foot warmer transfers heat directly from your feet and then upwards through your entire body
Includes a fan function that allows you to stay cool and use the unit year-round
Ergonomic design that fits under a desk or chair
Surface bumps on the tops and sides of the heater provide passive foot massage and promotes better posture
Full function foot operated controls, rocker switch controls are simple and easy to operate
Low-wattage consumption reduces circuit overloads
Automatic shut off after 4 hours
Internal over-temperature thermal breaker with a fail-safe back-up fuse
Hi, welcome to Polar Air. Did you know you can check in using our automated... oh, okay, that's fine, I'm happy to help you today. Now, it says here you've never travelled with us before, so do you need me to explain our services? Of course, I'd be happy to. First of all, there's no first class or second class or any of that. We treat all our guests extra special. Secondly, the extras are not included. So if you want peanuts or a blanket or anything like that, you'll have to bring your own. On some longer flights, drinks are available... oh, you're only headed to Bransfield Strait? Well, if you need anything, you can purchase it from the machines in the lobby. But remember, you'll have to do that before you reach the gate, because you won't be able to return once you've passed security.
Okay, now I will need to see a passport or a driver's license before I can print you a ticket. Hmm. How do I know this is you? I mean, all you penguins look alike to me. What? No, that's not hate speech, how is it... all right, all right, stop squawking, it's you, it's you. Here's your ticket.
Hey, I hate to do this but I just opened and I don't have anything but sardines in the till. Is there any chance you have something smaller than a mackerel?
Wear this shirt: and hum the theme from Rocky.
Don't wear this shirt: in the airport. There's probably some TSA rule about polar bears and they'll make you turn it inside out.
This shirt tells the world: "You are now free to move about the cabin."
We call this color: Baby Blue Skies
Design Placement: Centered
3X - S: 12" x 7.97" WXL - K4: 9" x 5.98"
Pantone Colors: White - 7541C - 7411C - 535C - 7531C - Black
Please check our <a class="modalPopUp sizingchart" href="http://www.woot.com/SizingChart.htm" title="http://www.woot.com/SizingChart.htm">sizing chart</a> before you order. The Woot Tee follows a classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.
(1) Fum�e de Sel - Chardonnay & Oak Smoked Salt 5oz glass jar
(1) Sel Gris de Gu�rande - Fine 6 oz glass jar
(1) Trio Glass Serving Tray
Description: (click show to see it)
You know how we get together every Thursday night and have dinner? No, we're not canceling. We really do look forward to seeing you guys every week. It's something else. You know how the dog has been getting a little rounder lately? That's my fault. Well, mine and Carol's fault, really. We've been feeding him under the table a lot and...
Look, I'm just going to come right out and say it, Pop. Mom's cooking is crap.
WHEW. After over thirty years that felt good to finally get off my chest. Really, really good. Wow.
I know, it sounds a little harsh to say such things about a woman whose meals you've been eating for years, but that's only because you've been trained to like it. You need a palate wake-up, Dad.
So next week, we were thinking about bring a little "present" for Mom to maybe help her spice up some of her dishes. It's a French Salt Trio Collection from SaltWorks, and I think it might help her break out of her cooking shell.
Listen, before you object, these SaltWorks people know spice. They're on the cutting edge of spices in the gourmet food world, which is why they were ranked #117 in Inc. Magazine's 500 Fastest-Growing Companies for 2007. They focus solely on the highest quality salts.
Like the Fleur de Sel de Gu�rande, for instance, a fine finishing salt that puts the exclamation point on many a meal. Young salt crystals skimmed from the salt ponds of France make up this mildly flavored, crisp texture seasoning made specially to nudge kitchen creations from good to great.
Then, there's the Fum�e de Sel, a truly one of a kind experience made from a premium hand-harvested sea salt, then cold smoked with the oak from wine barrels that have been used for years to age fine chardonnay wine. Sprinkled on meats and seafood, its subtle deep smoke flavor brings a unique experience to even the most experienced foodie at the dinner table.
And on the healthy side, there's the Sel Gris de Gu�rande. This 100% natural, whole mineral sea salt is stone ground with care and easily replaces regular table salt with something healthier that isn't stingy with the flavor.
It all comes with this really nice Trio Glass Serving Tray. You know how much Mom likes presentation? She'll be so eager to show this Salt Trio to her friends that she won't even realize why we got her the spices in the first place.
Trust us on this, Pop. You don't have to live in fear anymore. We can all have the flavor we deserve and not send Mom running to her room in tears.
French Salt Trio is a luxurious collection of 3 full size Artisan boutiques glass jars and includes a beautiful glass serving tray. The French salt collection is packaged in a beautiful display box and makes the perfect gift for cooks, chefs and all salt lovers.
The French Salt Collection contains:
(1) Studio One Up Jaxx Club Jr. Individual Sized Bean Bag
Description: (click show to see it)
My child, this is a special day for both of us. This is one of those times in a father's life where he gets to impart a great wisdom that he hopes will follow his progeny for the rest of their days. This is a day that I hope you will look back on in your adult years and say with a smile, "You know, my old man wasn't as dumb as mom made him out to be."
This is the day you get to experience the joy of taking your place here next to Dad's recliner. I gift to you your very own little seat, worthy of cushioning your tiny tuchus as you while away the hours by my side.
BEHOLD! Have a seat in your new throne, the Studio One Up Jaxx Club Jr. Individual Sized Bean Bag.
You see, there comes a time in everyone's life where you just want to sit in front of the tube and veg out a bit. But one shouldn't do so in a simple dining room chair. That, my child, is for savages. An adult needs a certain amount of comfort beneath them if they are to become true armchair quarterbacks and political pundits.
Feel that soft, lush micro-suede fabric cover. A lot like Daddy's special chair, isn't it? It comes with a nice breathable cotton/poly liner to ensure the utmost comfort. You'll also be glad to know that the inner furniture grade urethane foam will never need refilling to keep it's cushiony wonder, but it's also 100% earth-friendly. You might not know what that means right now, but I assure you, it's important.
Ah, I see you've already christened it with your flatulence. I am honored that you emulate me in this manner, young one. Now comes your next lesson in adulthood. I call this one "Blaming Things On The Dog".
Warranty: 1 Year Studio One Up
Soft, lush micro-suede fabric cover
Cover is machine washable and will easily zip off for cleaning
Breathable cotton/poly liner included
Protective liner with childproof zipper keeps the foam contents out of reach of curious little hands
Made with 100% earth-friendly recycled/shredded furniture grade urethane foam
Never needs refilling, unlike polystyrene bead bags
Built in handle makes it easy to move from room to room