Melissa: So, how'd it go last night? I want details, girl!
Angie: Well...it was great! He was great! I was great! Everything was great!
Melissa: So what's he like?
Angie: He's, he's so...different. I mean, good different. He's got this cute round body and this ergonomic layout, and he's so precise and quick. He looks great in any color - blue, white, green, pink, red, whatever. And you know what I really liked? He's plug-and-play, so no headgames.
Melissa: Sounds great. What does he do? What's he into?
Angie: Well, he's really into these first-person-shooter games, you know? But that's not all he's about. He's applying to culinary school and he really loves cats and he's got season tickets at the Modern Dance Basement and, and he's just really funny and sweet.
Melissa: Wow. It's so hard to meet a great guy anymore.
Angie: I know! Especially on the Internet!
Melissa: When will you be seeing him again?
Angie: Tuesday night, I think. We'll probably just hang around his place.
Melissa: Well, hey, on the 19th I'm going to be having some people over for dinner, so if you want to bring - hey, wait a minute. What's his name?
Angie: Oh, his name? It's not important. I mean, what's in a -
Melissa: What's his name? Come on, if he's gonna be your boyfriend I have to learn his name sometime.
Angie: It's, uh...it's Wolfking.
Melissa: What? Wolfgang?
Angie: No. Wolfking. That's his first name.
Melissa: What about his last name?
Melissa: Wolfking Warrior? Are you serious?
Angie: Yes. Wolfking Warrior.
Melissa: Is that his real name or what?
Angie: I don't know. It's what he goes by.
Melissa: Wow. Listen, Angie...I don't know exactly how to say this, but -
Angie: I know. I have to dump him.
Warranty: 1 Year Wolfking
Improved Game play - custom designed for FPS and other PC games to give you precise control with one hand
Follow your instincts - ergonomic circular keypad design gives you greater control with a more instinctive layout of the main keys used for FPS
Oversized vertical space bar - with aligned "WASD" layout, dual "Ctrl" and custom enlarged keys to maximize comfort, increase control and fit all hand sizes
Perfect solution for laptop gaming - also can be used with any regular keyboard
Compact Lightweight - takes up little space on your desk and easy to carry
Communication keys - allow you to stay in touch with your friends at the touch of a button
Weapon keys - convenient button access allows you to switch weapons quickly
Auxiliary keys - give you the control you need to customize your gamepad according to your personal preferences
Specially weighted keys - enables greater precision and control of keystrokes
Plug & Play - USB. No drivers required
Customizable - height adjustment gives you better comfort
Noise reducing technology- flexible 3-layer silicon membrane allows you to play quietly
Quality & Performance- keyboard lifespan rated at over 10 million keystrokes
In the box:
Wolfking Warrior Game Pad
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If aliens ever come to Earth, and they aren't the sort of aliens who were planning to gnaw off our heads with their little second mouths, the thing they will probably have the most trouble understanding is love. Because we all go through it again and again and again, and we can't even figure it out for ourselves.
There's the bold type of love that has you climbing precarious ladders to the sky, and the gentle type of love that makes you offer to walk someone's dog on a rainy night. There's the deep, passionate love that could ignite a blowtorch, and the selfish, irresponsible love that makes you not even care that you're about to kill a dude with an icicle. There's even a love that dare not speak its name, but since we dare not speak it we're not even sure why we brought it up here.
You can love the past so much that you don't want to go forward. You can love a future so much that you misunderstand. Love is a little word that can crawl down your throat, burrow in your stomach, pop out of your chest, bleed acid and then grow to nine feet tall and proceed to eat the entire crew one at a time. And who can escape from that? Not us, my sweet. Not us.
Wear this shirt: when you're pre-dating. Read it aloud. Now try it as an agent noun. What do you mean you don't know what an agent noun is? Look, just say pre-dater. Yeah, but not that Southern. More of an "or" sound. No, "oooor". Look, it's a simple pun you should be able to figure out from the context clues, I don't know why you're making it so hard for yourself.
(1) 2006 Savoy Vineyard Anderson Valley Pinot Noir
(1) 2006 La Encantada Vineyard Sta. Rita Hills Pinot Noir
Description: (click show to see it)
The first thing I remember is running through the woods. These weren't, like, shiny happy hippie woods - these were the kind of woods Hansel and Gretel got lost in. I don't know how I got there, or what I was doing, or what I was running from. Actually, it felt more like I was running toward something. Then I tripped over a branch or a vine or something. I guess I hit my head and blacked out.
When I woke up, I was still in the forest. It was night-time, but I could see a dark red glow through the trees. It reminded me of that Laser Metallica show they do at the Planetarium. I suddenly felt compelled to go to it - like, if I didn't, my life would forever be missing something. So I stumbled toward the light. My mouth started watering. My hair stood on end. I had an overpowering craving for cheese. My mind didn't know what was in store there, but it was like my body did.
Then I reached the clearing and saw them: two fairies or pixies or tinkerbells or whatever. Two little women with wings flying and dancing and giggling. They looked like they were made of yellowish glass, but the red glow was coming from inside them. It blew my mind.
Then they looked right at me and stopped flying around. I about crapped my pants.
But they laughed and flew over to me. They couldn't have been bigger than a Dustbuster. They took my hands and get this - they lifted me into the air. By my hands. Even though I'm like 275 pounds and they were tiny little glass fairies. I'm floating at this point, held up by their tiny, glassy hands. So I go "Where am I?" And they're like "The enchanted Pinot Noir forest - specifically, the Roessler Recreation and Picnic Area."
Then I go "Who are you?" And one of them says, "I'm Savoy!" And she looks at me and I swear to God, all the sudden I could smell blackberries and mushrooms and the moss and mint and dirt of the forest floor. It was a little spicy, too, somehow. Then I'm tasting it, and then I taste dark plum and fig and a little bit of pencil lead. I'm freaking out but this pixie just giggles.
The other one goes "I'm La Encantada!" As soon as I look at her, we're off on the whole smell-taste rollercoaster again. It was like somebody was smoking pork with lots of herbs and spices, then somebody else opened up a bag of fresh cherries. I was like "How are you doing this?" but this one just laughed, too.
Then I remember that I'm, like, floating above the ground - flying, almost - just being held up there by these two little-bitty fairies. And I start laughing, too. And we all laugh together, and we fly, and we dance, and the moon casts its cold light down on their warm glow makes colors I've never seen. I don't know how long this went on. Hours? Days? Anyway, at some point I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was morning, and there was no trace of the fairies. But aside from a mild case of cottonmouth, I felt incredible. I've never felt more free, more alive. It really changed everything for me.
Oh, also, I was naked this whole time. Did I mention that?
2006 Savoy Vineyard Anderson Valley Pinot Noir
TA (g/100ml): 0.61
Time in Barrel: 11 months in oak
Alcohol: 14.0 %
323 Cases Produced
2006 La Encantada Vineyard Sta. Rita Hills Pinot Noir