The tastiest weapon in the world is a wooter and his Marshmallow
Popper. It is your sweet tooth which must be harnessed if you expect to
survive combat in the hellholes of Candyland! If your sweet tooth is
not sharp and strong, you will hesitate at the moment of truth. The
enemy's marshmallows will hit you first! You will become sticky wooters
and then you will be in a world of chocolate because wooters are not
allowed to get sticky without permission! Do you gummi maggots
Tonight, you will sleep with your Marshmallow
Poppers. You will give your Marshmallow Popper a sweet name because
this is the only candy you people are going to get. Your days of
tongue-licking Mary Jane Lollipop through her perty pink wrapper are
over! You're married to this piece, this weapon of sugar and plastic.
And you will be faithful! Also, you will not eat the included green foam
pellets, because they are not edible! And they taste lousy, anyway! Now
pray, you sweetstains!
This is my Marshmallow Popper. My
Marshmallow Popper is my best friend, because all my other friends are
tired of me shooting mini-marshmallows at them all the time.
Marshmallows are sold separately. Without marshmallows, my popper is
useless. Without me, I am useless. I must pop my marshmallows true. I
must pop straighter than my enemy, who is trying to make me sticky. I
must goo him before he goos me. I swear this creed: my Marshmallow
Popper and myself are major annoyances to my family, my friends, and my
country. And don't get me started on my pets. So be it, until we run
out of marshmallows, or somebody breaks my Marshmallow Popper to make
me stop. Amen.
You will bring a dessert storm of sweet,
sweet pain to the enemy or I will drop so much sugar on your head
you'll fart rock candy! I don't take kindly to saccharine-livered
Sweet-'n'-Low-suckers cloying up my beloved Corps! Understood? I said
is that understood? Now fall in, sweetbags!
I don't know but I been told I don't know but I been told
Even eskimos like marshmallows! Even eskimos like marshmallows!
Warranty: 90 Day Idea Village
Pump action marshmallow shooter
Use the included green non-edible foam pellets or mini marshmallows as ammo
Holds 20 marshmallows for rapid fire action
Shoots marshmallows up to 25 feet
Makes an explosive popping noise when the marshmallow exits the popper barrel
In the box:
20 Green Non-Edible Foam Pellets
Not for children under 8 years of age
Got some updated prices? Click here and update them!
Hundreds of years ago, people would get up in the morning and walk
to the center of town, where they would lower their buckets into the
well and bring up water so that they could drink. Today, we get up in
the morning and ride our bikes to the corner store where we can take
bottles from the freezers so that we can drink. And also we pay for it.
We've come so far!
But our water supply has so much to
offer. All those drugs, flushed down the toilet. All those hormones
from birth control and mood altering medications. Tiny shellfish and
the occasional bit of metal from pipes our grandfathers made. You know
what that makes a person? Strong.
So bring it on, aliens! We
don't need those cold germs this time. We've been drinking cow hormones
for a couple of decades now! We're a country of angry minotaurs, and
we're ready! Mooo! Moooooooo!
This shirt was designed by: jewelwing. who looks lovely but is probably too heavy to fly. Diamonds aren't real aerodynamic, peacock.
Wear this shirt: when you're going for a drink with Gregory Hines.
Don't wear this shirt: if you're a Dasani rep. There's no need to give away all your trade secrets.
This shirt tells the world: "You know, for the same price we could just have a few beers..."
We call this color: Throwing Out The Baby Blue With The Bathwater
Design Placement: Centered
S - 3X: 12" x 7.94" WXL - K4: 9" x 5.95"
about you without complete understanding of your taste" like the gift
of a wine rack. It's the gift certificate to a music store, it's the
check from your grandmother, it's the free french fries coupon from a
young classmate. And you know what? It's a perfectly acceptable thing.
this Woot Exclusive 12 Bottle Cubby Wine Rack as a gift says "Hey,
there's no way my palate will ever be as sophisticated as yours so I
didn't even consider a bottle." It says "I wanted to give you a nice
way to keep the wine you personally chose in a small, neat space." It
even says "I know you've probably had too much wine to want to bother
with tools so <a href="http://users.rcn.com/devin.swisher/Xrack/Welcome%20To%20CubbyRack.html">here's a sort of hypnotic video</a>
that proves you can assemble the whole thing with just your bare
hands." And what other gift can say all that? Especially with hypertext?
12 Bottle Cubby Wine Rack can be positioned vertically or horizontally
and accommodates standard wine bottles. For a rackless wine lover, it's
exactly what they need. They'll be so impressed. Why, they might even
decide to open a bottle for you right away! Just please please please
don't try to figure out which wine goes with free fries. That way lies