October 11: The eternal Amazon flows brown and, uh, wet as
today I attempt to make history. I shall shove off from Iquitos, Peru
and sail to Manaus, Brazil in a skiff made entirely of Kingston DT100/16GB 16GB USB Data Traveler 100 Flash Drives. My provisions for the weeks ahead: nothing but Kingston DT100/16GB 16GB USB Data
Traveler 100 Flash Drives. I got them really cheap from an unspecified
source. My aim? To prove that this marvelous device is more than just a
portable data storage and transfer solution - it is an indispensable
tool of survival in even the most inhospitable settings. They called me
mad at the institute. That's why I beat up that orderly, stole his
swipe card, and escaped. Now we shall see who the crazy ones are.
October 12: Attempted to catch fish using a Kingston DT100/16GB
as bait and my hand as the hook. Lost two fingers to piranhas. But
fortunately, they weren't important ones. Eventually did manage to
catch a long, thin, pointy-nosed fish of some kind. Ate it raw, but
very bony. Vomited for hours. Throat and gut in intense pain, but
spirits high. Onward, wiser and a little lighter.
Sighted some natives along the riverbank. Appeared friendly and willing
to trade. Also, the women were totally topless, just like in National Geographic or Hustler. I docked and they met me with smiles. But when they saw that all I had to trade was Kingston DT100/16GB 16GB USB Data
Traveler 100 Flash Drives, they turned hostile. I was unable to
convincingly explain the benefits of its 16GB of storage space and
high-speed USB 2.0 connection in the local
language, which seems to consist mainly of clicks, snorts, and the
occasional guttural choking sound. Had to flee back to my skiff in a
hail of poison darts. Still, I spotted some edible rocks, so today was
not a total bust.
October 15: Wrong about the "edible" rocks.
Hungry. So very hungry. All I've had to eat in the past week is that
bonefish, those rocks, some algae that produced terrifying psychedelic
visions, and some chunks of raw sloth meat I stole from a couple of
native kids. I saw a Hardee's in the town of Leticia, but resisted the
temptation - that stuff'll kill you.
October 21: Skiff ran aground on a sandbar. When I try to shove it back into the stream, it comes apart in my hands. Kingston DT100/16GB 16GB USB Data
Traveler 100 Flash Drives everywhere. I shall make camp here. Although
I'm only a few days out of Manaus, I cry continuously, all day, every
day. And not like I do at home.
October 22: Early
morning. Several jaguars assembled outside my tent in the dawn light.
Now they're getting closer. I am pelting them with Kingston DT100/16GB
Flash Drives to drive them away. It's a well-documented fact that big
cats are terrified of portable data storage devices, and I expect
they'll soon retreat back into the jun
Warranty: 5 Year Kingston
Capacity, 16GB of flash storage
Compliant, designed to Hi-Speed USB 2.0 specifications
Convenient, pocket-sized for easy transportability
Simple, just plug into a USB port
Practical, capless, USB connector protected within case
Dimensions, 2.35" x 0.88" x 0.37" (59.7mm x 22.3mm x 9.5mm)
Operating temperatures, 32� F to 140� F (0� C to 60� C)
Storage temperatures,-4� F to 185� F (-20� C to 85� C)
Compatible Operating Systems:
Windows XP (SP1, SP2)
Mac OS X v.10.3.x+
In the box:
Kingston DT100/16GB 16GB USB Data Traveler
Got some updated prices? Click here and update them!
Ghosts aren't real. Werewolves aren't real. Vampires aren't real.
Witches aren't real, no matter what those oddly-dressed ladies at the
Pagan Picnic might tell you. The real menace of Halloween night? Candy.
No, not because some lunatic is handing out Zagnuts full of razor
blades. That was a fantasy, too. We mean regular old tooth-rotting,
flab-generating candy. The only real monsters you'll see on October 31
are little kids hepped up on too many bite-size cubes of high-fructose
corn syrup. And the only thing your kids have to fear is candy itself.
kidnappers, we guess. And getting hit by a car. And, depending on the
weather, catching pneumonia. You know, maybe we'll keep our kids in
This shirt was designed by: MJ of <a href="http://compete-tee-tion.blogspot.com/">Compete-Tee-Tion</a> fame, our favorite t-shirt contest blogger. She also designed <a href="http://shirt.woot.com/Friends.aspx?k=4113">The Cake is a Liar</a>,
which debuted on November 3, 2007 and remains for sale. Unfortunately,
the shirt that debuted the day before is also still for sale, making
MJ's design the second longest-running shirt in Shirt.Woot history. We'd link to that one, too, but this is MJ's time to shine.
Wear this shirt: to your work Halloween party, if you work in a dentist's office.
Don't wear this shirt: to your work Halloween party, if you work at a candy company.
This shirt tells the world: "Did you just get back from church? No? Then why are your teeth so holey? Haw haw!"
We call this color: Kavitelly Green.
Design Placement: Centered
M - 3X: 13" x 6.87"
S - WS: 9.75" x 5.15"
Pantone Color(s): White - 108C - 495C - 359C - 1495C - Black
But it would be wrong of us to begrudge Jeff his awesome life. More importantly, we'd only be hurting ourselves. Because the sour taste of resentment is no comparison for the palatable pleasures of these three GunBun wines. Even pale, high-strung, shivering Morlocks like us can appreciate the supple mouthfeel and complexly layered flavors of the Gundlach Bundschu 2005 Pinot Noir, Rhinefarm Vineyard. This medium-weight Sonoma red announces itself with aromas of black cherry, dried rose petal, and black spice leading to juicy dark fruit and mineral flavors. Keep it around for three to seven years to taste it at its best.
Then there's the Gundlach Bundschu 2005 Mountain Cuv�e, Rhinefarm Vineyard. Born of steep hillside earth, warmed by lots of daylight, cooled by sea breezes, it's an alchemical miracle of toasty plum aromas and raspberry-cocoa flavors. Soft and round at first, meaty and spicy to finish, this pleasurable Merlot-Cab blend is only going to get better over the next two to five years.
The Gundlach Bundschu 2005 Merlot, Rhinefarm Vineyard completes the trifecta. Spiced black cherry, dark plum, and blueberry aromas and flavors wrap around a delicate layer of tea leaf. Broad but finely textured tannins keep the juicy, dense palate contained. As great as it is now, it should peak in another five or ten years.
As the lingering finish fades, we realize: anybody responsible for bottled joy like this deserves all the pleasure life has to offer. No matter how talented and successful Jeff Bundschu is, no matter how maddeningly nice he might be, no matter how much he enjoys his life, we just can't bring ourselves to hate the guy. And as bitter and envious as we are, that's saying something.
Speaking of saying something, if your German pronunciation is a little rusty, just say "Gundlach Bundschu" like this:
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