(1) Uniden DXI5586-3 5.8GHz 3 Handset Phone System
Description: (click show to see it)
In the future, our distant descendants will enjoy Saturday
mornings--which they'll call Knievelday mornings--at the Museum of
Ancient Technologies in the beautiful coastal city of New Atlanta. A
popular attraction will be the Terrace of Telephones.
how our early phones will amuse them! They'll hug their newly released
iFriend close as they laugh their weird, futuristic laugh-- a series of
spasmodic nose-breaths --at the primitive candlestick models. Then
they'll use some crazy iFeature to find their way to the interactive
exhibit in the holotorium, where they'll marvel as they find out just
what a senselessly insulting experience it once was to navigate a
20th-Century touchtone customer service labyrinth. They'll see one of
the last known Bluetooth headsets and wonder to each other how
21st-Century man could have been so dim as not to recognize the
device's permanent softening effect on the brain.
they'll get to this Uniden three-handset system... and the nasal
hyperventilation will subside. They'll admire the stylish contours of
the handsets and the soft glow of the backlit LCDs. They'll imagine
themselves in our time, using one of the ten memory-dial locations to
call one of their closest friends. (A steamboat captain, they'll
figure, or a lightsaber operator in one of our mammoth meat plants.)
about these phones-- maybe their caller ID support or their automatic
redial --will make our time seem less backward to these Earth Citizens
of the future. They'll start to see us as a vibrant, ambitious people
with a young and exciting culture, capable of great phones, and
destined to give rise, over millennia, to their own freaky sci-fi
society. For that, they'll privately respect and envy us.
when they come out of their reverie, they'll look at their iFriend and
wish that maybe it was a little more "petrolpunk". And they'll promise
each other they'll visit the Uniden phones again next Knievelday, and
the Knievelday after that, and the Knievelday after that, too.
Like My Men $10.00 + $0 shipping -or- $5 expedited shipping
(1) Brown Woot Tee
Description: (click show to see it)
1st place in Derby #50: Energy, with 739 votes!
shirt is a subtle, yet aromatic blend of wit and comfort. The design
was first sketched on a legal pad, then torn up and fed to small
Peruvian bats, which then digested the design over a period of two
weeks. The bats used their natural process of peptic deconstruction to
leave the fibers soft and pliable, and the fibers were then combined
with just a dash of superiority extracted from the mouth of the oldest
bee in Rome. This m�lange was then scraped into an ivory mug,
where it was made to feel bad for participating in the death of an
elephant. After settling, the dry fibers were then woven into the final
shirt, and participated in a two day discussion in the role of Lo-Fi in
the current underground music scene. This shirt will most certainly
work with a Mac.
This shirt was designed by:
Jack31081. In 1337 that spells "ELOBI" which means he's either a Jedi
or thinks Jeff Lynne swings both ways. Hey, you never know, Jack, it
was a wild time for everybody back then.
Wear this shirt:
if you're hitting on the barista. "Hey, did you notice my shirt?" is
always a surefire pickup line. It makes you look dangerous and cool.
Don't wear this shirt: if you work at Starbucks. Although maybe they'd let you get away with it if you burned the edges.
This shirt tells the world: "Do you have a skinny iced mocha frappe with cinnamon outlet so my laptop can enjoy it here too?"
We call this color: Cappuccino Brown. Which, coincidentally, is also the name of our favorite blacksploitation movie.
Placement: Upper Right Side
3X - M: 2.5" x 3.34"
S - WS: 1.87" x 2.5"
Pantone Color(s): - White - 362 C - Warm Gray 3 C - Cool Gray 5 C