You watch, and wait. You're biding your time. You're keeping your
head down. No, you're nobody special, just a simple desk worker like so
many others here in the headquarters of this multinational
corporation...until that moment when you can make your big score, clean
out a couple of the company's petty cash accounts, and vamoose to the
beaches of Belize under an assumed name. All you'll have to do is stop
off at your apartment for that fake passport hidden under your
But lately, you're starting to wonder if they
suspect something, if your co-workers can tell you're not like
everybody else around here. Oh, you try to fit in: you go to happy hour
at TGI Friday's like the rest of the cubicle-dwellers; you sit through The Biggest Loser
every week so you and the other drones have something to talk about;
you've even bought a few pairs of pleated khakis. Still, you feel
marked somehow, like people can see right through your office-worker
disguise to the corrupt heart underneath.
We know what the problem is: you're not wearing one of those Bluetooth earpieces.
With the Jabra BT135 Bluetooth
Headset, the clock-punching pinheads will accept you, accept you, one
of them. You can use it to answer calls, make voice-dial calls, redial,
and more, all without touching your Bluetooth-enabled mobile phone. But
don't worry about any of that - nobody uses these things to make calls.
They're a tribal marking, a badge of conformity, an ear tag like those
worn by pigs on the feed lot. Put it on and fade into the office crowd.
And if you start to worry about how stupid you look, just think about
that beach in Belize.
Warranty: 90 days Woot
Bluetooth compliance: Bluetooth version 2.0 specifications
Bluetooth profiles: Bluetooth headset and hands-free profiles
Operating range: Up to 10 metres (30 feet)
Talk time: Up to 8h (subject to phone)
Stand-by time: Up to 170h
Charging time: Approximately 2 hours
Weight: 14 g.
Microphone type: 6mm omni-directional
Battery type: Rechargeable lithium polymer.
Pairing passkey or PIN: 0000
Supported special features:
Last number redial
Call hold/Call wait
Dedicated volume control
In the box:
Jabra BT135 Headset
Got some updated prices? Click here and update them!
Wanted lemonade and got chili sauce? Friend opened the box of your
first edition Luke Skywalker action figure? Caucused for Christopher
Dodd? Just read Spider-Man: Brand New Day? Found out a Libyan was voted
president of the U.N.? Heard someone say that Firefly was crap? Fond of
tigers? Sounds like you need to tell the world that you're not going
along with the Social Contract this morning. Make sure your disgust
will be properly attired.
This shirt was designed by:
dekonstruct, a man pushed too far by an unrelenting system designed to
break him... before he broke it. Unless he's a lady like in that rockin'
Wear this shirt: to the new
Death Metal Chuck E. Cheese that just opened, across from the pawn
shops. I hear the Rockafire Explosion is still looking for roadies!
Don't wear this shirt: to a Buddhist temple. Calm yourself, young moose sketch. Find peace within, little squirrel drawing.
This shirt tells the world: "I don't care if he was running a halfway house for molested puppies, David Cross had no excuse! No excuse at all!"
We call this color: CranberRAAAAAAAAAAAry
3X - M: 10.5" x 11"
S-WS: 7.87" x 8.25"
Sorry to be so abrupt, but we've got no time to chit-chat. If you want this exquisite Schug Carneros Estate Winery three-pack - and if you enjoy wine, you do - act fast. Like, now. If you dawdle, if you tarry, if you delay, we can't promise anything.
It's not just because it might sell out, although that's always a possibility with wines this good. No, you need to buy before Walter Schug learns more about Woot, realizes what kind of penny-ante rinky-dink outfit he's gotten mixed up with, and severs all ties to Wine.Woot.
Remember, this is Walter Schug we're talking about. The guy who introduced Syrah to California. The man responsible for California's first proprietary Bordeaux-style blend. He started making wine in the Rhineland in 1953, and spent the '70s making Joseph Phelps Vineyards a California powerhouse with legendary vineyard-designated Cabernets. Then he founded Schug Carneros Estate Winery in 1980, establishing an impeccable reputation for classic winemaking values.
Does he really want to be associated with a company whose most innovative achievement is something called the Bag O' Crap? Did he move to Carneros to indulge his passion for Chardonnay and Pinot Noir, only to wind up sharing bandwidth with the Screaming Monkey?
We're not about to ask him. All we can do is keep our heads down and offer these three instant classics while we can. They say the cool, marine climate of Carneros does some amazing things for Pinot Noir and Chardonnay, and these two bottles of those varietals each hold 750 mL of supporting evidence.
We're especially jazzed about the Schug 2006 Sonoma Coast Chardonnay. See, Wine Spectator named the 2005 Chardonnay the best white wine value in the world, and we're thirsting to see if the '06 lives up to its reputation. If we have to down glass after glass analyzing its brisk, bright fruit flavors and buttery-smooth texture, well, that's a sacrifice we're willing to make in the pursuit of knowledge.
Our excitement over the Chard isn't meant to take anything away from the Schug 2006 Sonoma Coast Pinot Noir. Hard to believe this much robust raspberry and cherry flavor can be had for a mere twentyish bucks a bottle. Just goes to show you don't have to be rich to drink rich.
On top of all this, it almost seems greedy to take a bottle of Schug 2003 "Heritage Reserve" Merlot. But we will. When we think about its smoky cherry and coffee bouquet and its full-bodied cassis and chocolate flavors, all thoughts of morality go out the window. We just want more, more, more.
Maybe Walter Schug won't get wise to the setup. Maybe he'll be too busy maintaining the Schug standards of winecraft to waste too much brainpower on a Mickey Mouse operation like us. But maybe he won't. And maybe you better jump on this Schug Three-Pack before the jig is up.