Hey, look, the Infocus Screenplay 7210 HD DLP Projector
is back! Once again, it's even cheaper than it was last time - despite
the fact that it remains one of the best home-theater projectors on the
market today. It's like that thing Matthew McConaughey's older-dude
character said in Dazed & Confused about how he keeps
getting older, but the chicks stay the same age. Only not sleazy, or
potentially illegal, or...well, OK, it's not that similar at all. We just
like thinking about Dazed & Confused.
And we like watching it on the ever-cheaper Infocus Screenplay 7210 HD DLP Projector.
If you've been here before, you've probably seen this 720p hi-def,
high-end, high-value pitcher-shooter before. You've probably marveled
at its 2800:1 contrast ratio and 1100 ANSI lumens. You've been titillated and intrigued by tales of its deeep DarkChip 3 blacks. (Yes, "deeep" with three e's - it's just that black.) You've assumed the phrase "Carl Zeiss optics" was a misprint. And your eyes have goggled at the ludicrously puny price.
And then you decided it was still too expensive.
it's back, cheaper than ever, now somewhere south of half its list
price with all the same potent entertainment powers. It's like that
thing Matthew McConaughey's older-dude - oh, wait, we said that
already. Point is, we can't be sure the Infocus 7210 will ever again be
available at this redonkulous low price. Jump on it while you can. Act
now - supplies are limited. Carpe projectorum. For all we know, this will be the last - the very last! - time we'll be able to sell this eye-popping projector at this eye-popping price.
A word of advice for you tortured, artistic types: People don't find
that schtick deep; they just think you kind of kill the party. All that
sullen, shoegazing music you like; the Sartre books; the cutting--sure,
it makes you seem "intense," but it's also exactly this much fun: None.
Now, we're not going to ask you to completely reinvent
yourself overnight. But would it kill you to splash just a little bit
of color into your otherwise funereal wardrobe? Consider this here
shirt. It's black, so it'll match your skinny jeans and dour
demeanor--but it's tastefully adorned with a tree, universal symbol of
life and renewal. Hopeful, right?
Of course, like the hole
where your heart should be, this tree's leafy branches are defined by
negative space--but unlike said hole, they're handsomely set against a
rainbow swatch of gently mood-enhancing color.
You know what? We like you a little better already. Gee, this is going to be a great day after all!
This shirt was designed by:
Michael Clinger, an animator fresh out of college, currently working as
an animator/compositor for Ball State University. If you've got work
for him, contact him at <a href="mailto:email@example.com">firstname.lastname@example.org</a>.
Wear this shirt to: the Panic! at the Disco show.
Don't wear this shirt to: a home with multiple cats, unless you're packing a lint brush.
This shirt tells the world: "My heart leaps up when I behold rainbow in the sky. Or near my remaining kidney."
If you know what we know
about Pinot, then you know there's no place better suited to growing
Pinot Noir than Oregon's Willamette Valley. The growing conditions
there are like Plato's abstract conception of a tree: ideal. And Don
and Wendy Lange first plunged their fingers into the rich loam of the
Valley way back in 1987 - if they're not quite the Adam and Eve of the
Oregon wine scene, they're close. All that time, Don and his son Jesse have been chanting their mantra of "Structure, Texture, Balance", like a wizened,
wine-obsessed Mr. Miyagi teaching Daniel Russo the ancient secrets of the art. The structured, textured, balanced Lange
Estate wines prove they're not just crazy people. Let's see...two
resplendent Pinot Noirs, made by longtime Pinot Noir experts, from the
epicenter of Pinot Noir production...do we really need to say more?
then. Available for the first time anywhere, the Lange Estate Winery
2006 Pinot Noir Reserve grew up during the warm, dry summer of 2006,
the kind of exceptional growing season that many vintners would give at
least one finger for, maybe even an entire hand. Sparkling like a ruby
and smelling like a cherry, this gorgeous Pinot Noir delivers juicy
mouthfuls of candied apple, dried cherry, and red currant, with a side
of black tea. Things get spicy for the long, savory finish. The 2006
Pinot Noir Reserve may seem a little flashy, but like ol' Diz sez, it
ain't braggin' if you can do it.
Grown entirely on the Lange
Estate Vineyard in Dundee Hills (the birthplace of Oregon Pinot Noir),
the Lange 2005 Pinot Noir Dundee Hills Estate has already racked up 90+
ratings from the likes of Wine Review Online, along with accolades like
"Pinot pleasure in a glass". Who are we to argue? We'll just tell you
that this exceptional single-vineyard number is as silky and
full-bodied as a Victoria's Secret model, although it smells a lot more
like raspberries and plums. The palate? Imagine smoking lush black
cherries on a slab of slate rock. Then imagine that tasting fifty times
better than you think. It's like that.
We're aware that the
price tag on this Pinot duo is a little higher than usual around here.
Paradoxically, it's also a better bargain than we usually offer, too.
Not because of magic or alchemy or higher-order calculus - just because
these two superlative Pinot Noirs would be worth twice this price. Or
even more, if you're on a deserted island thousands of miles from the
nearest sommelier. But if that's the case, we probably don't ship
there. Sorry we even brought it up. We didn't mean to taunt you with
images of us luxuriating in the rapturous flavor cascade of this Lange
Willamette Valley Pinot Noir Duo.
Oh, one more thing: orders to certain states will take even tediously longer than usual, since we're trying to keep the wine from spoiling in the heat. Don't blame us, blame fossil fuel emissions. Because they don't have feelings.
Lange Estate Winery 2006 Pinot Noir Reserve
RELEASE DATE: September 1, 2007
HARVEST DATE: September 18 - October 25, 2006
CASE PRODUCTION: 2500 cases
AGING: 10 months in French Oak, approximately 20% new
Lange 2005 Pinot Noir Dundee Hills Estate
RELEASE DATE: November 17, 2006
HARVEST DATE: October 10 - 27, 2005
CASE PRODUCTION: 400 cases
AGING: 13 months in French Oak, approximately 40% new