What is Wine.Woot.com?
- We were all pretty despondent when we couldn’t work out the logistics for massage.woot.com. We started to question the very idea of spinning off another new dot-woot. But then woot.com offered our Rinfrescante wine and we were positively deluged with inquiries from friends and family pleading for more (of course the cheapskates wanted more – they got it for free). This was enough “market research” for us. We reactivated our wine-industry hookup and wine.woot.com was conceived.
- Then we had to figure out if we’d completely lost our minds. It turns out wine and electronic gadgets really aren’t so different, commercially speaking. Both industries run on fast product cycles. Gadgeteers and oenophiles alike have strong opinions, so we let them sound off in our community forums. And because winemakers make marketing predictions far in advance of product release – just like electronics manufacturers – wine inventory is equally subject to overstock, excess, and end-of-life opportunities.
- So every week, wine.woot.com will uncork a sweet new wine deal. For now, if you run into any bugs on the site, just think of this as the beta version. That sounds cooler anyway. Like our uncouth, barely-civilized older stepbrother, woot.com, here we’ll offer one-time-only prices that put the rest of the Internet to shame. Shame on you, Internet!
Wait, this is a joke, right? You Woot guys...
- Look in our eyes. Do we look like we’re joking? We enjoy a good laugh as much as the next deal-a-day web site, but when it comes to wine, we’re serious. Deadly serious.
Will Woot.com go down the drain now that you guys’ll be putting all your time and money into this wine folly?
- No, this bold new adventure will not harm the Woot.com experience one tiny bit. Our platonic partners at Wine Country Connect will do all the legwork as we sit back and let the cash shower down upon us. If anything, these windfall profits will help us offer even better deals, if such a thing is even possible under the laws of quantum mechanics.
Has Woot jumped the shark?
- No, we look terrible in a wetsuit. Nor have we skipped the buffalo, climbed the quail, leapt the baboon, sprung the salamander, or scaled the Atlantic herring. All reports to the contrary are scurrilous slanders spread by those who wish us harm.
Do I use my existing woot account?
- Yes, your Woot account transfers over to the wine.woot.com site as smooth as a ‘97 Napa Valley Cab. Or, if you’re not a wine person yet, a baby’s bottom. Whichever.
Can I really buy wine on the Internet?
- Thanks to our esteemed Supreme Court, recent and dramatic changes in how wine can be sold and delivered in the U.S. allow wine.woot.com to bring wine directly from the winery to you. Lucky for us (and you), premium wineries have started to wake up to this newfangled World Wide Web thing and are motivated, dare we say thirsty, to reach a new audience. It all adds up to the best wine deals in the country, one vintage at a time.
- We’re talking breakthrough stuff here, connecting wine producers to drunkards – er, connoisseurs in the most efficient and cost-effective way possible. Call it disintermediation, call it cutting out the middleman, just don’t call us late for the wine tasting.
Is this one of those monthly-fee wine club deals?
- No, this isn’t one of those monthly-fee wine club deals. We don’t lock you into buying a series of offerings from one producer or region. Buy once a week, or once a year, or once a millennium. Pick and choose whatever sparks your tongue, the way the Founding Fathers intended. The power is yours. Use it wisely, grasshopper.
I’m new to wine. I’m confused, intimidated, and frankly a little frightened. Can I trust you to sell me the good stuff?
- If you’re just getting hip to the whole wine trip, we’ll be offering a variety of premium, ultra-premium, and mega-super-premium wines from known wineries. Most of the time, anyway. On the rare occasion that we uncork some off-brand rotgut, we’ll tell you. And we just might throw the odd wine accessory at you, if we’re feeling puckish. Fear not, n00b – our wines will be great to cut your teeth on (not literally, unless something goes terribly, terribly wrong).
What if I get bad wine or a damaged shipment?
- First of all, if you think the wine tastes bad, wait a few minutes and try another sip. It may need to “open up” (wine term) or your palate might be “wack” (colloquial term). It’s amazing how much food alters the flavor of wine: eat a vinaigrette-soaked salad first and even a ‘68 Rothschild will taste like Windex. But after you have appropriately cleansed the palate region (not with soap or anything – eat some bread, cheese or chocolate) and the stuff still tastes lousy, contact us and we’ll coordinate with the winery to send you a replacement. And of course, you can skip the palate-cleansing stuff and just get ahold of us for a replacement if the bottle is broken.
If I like the wine, can I buy more later?
- As the gorilla told the bartender, “Not at these prices.” Our chums at Wine Country Connect are working on an arrangement whereby the wines offered on Wine.woot.com will be offered by the case for a limited time on the winecountryconnect.com website. They’ll still be a good deals, but it’s not like they’re Woot or anything. Poor things.
Who is Wine Country Connect?
- Wine Country Connect is a posse straight outta Sonoma, California, and our resident experts when it comes to the nectar of the gods of which we speak. They’ve been at this a while and gots the inside connects, if you catch our drift. They also really know a bargain when they see one. WCC identifies and sources high-value wines in their ‘hood (and a sprinkling from Oregon and Washington) for us Texas-based Woot folks. Hey, we love our Lone Star State for many reasons, but the quality of her wines is not one of them.
Is my user information shared with the winery?
- Ultimately, yes, In most cases, it is the winery’s responsibility to record the sale and pay taxes, so they do require that type of information. We can’t imagine any problems arising from this, but if being on record somewhere as a wine-drinker bothers you, you may want to think twice about ordering.
What states can you ship to?
- Thanks to stick-in-the-mud buzzkilling state legislators, wine may only be delivered to the following states:
- Arizona (expect longer delivery times)
- District of Columbia
- Indiana (expect longer delivery times)
- Massachusetts (expect longer delivery times)
- New Hampshire
- New Jersey (expect longer delivery times)
- New Mexico
- New York
- North Carolina
- North Dakota
- South Carolina
- West Virginia
- If your state’s not on the list, no wine for you! Take it up with your state assemblyperson. We comply with all federal, state, and local laws in providing this wine.
How long is shipment going to take?
- Unless you’re in New Jersey, Massachusetts, Arizona, or Indiana, you should get your wine in 2-3 weeks, often sooner. Those four states require us to jump through certain regulatory hoops that add another couple weeks to the process. But hey, this is wine we’re talking about. It’s still gonna taste good (maybe even better), and since we leave it to the wineries to get the wine to you, you can count on their experience to send their wine using their expert methodologies. Aside from the annoyance of having to wait, you New Jerseyites, Massachusettsians, Arizonoids and Indianamen will enjoy your wine every bit as much as people in hardier-partying states.
I’m under the age of 21 – can I order wine?
- You know the old adage “there are no stupid questions”? Congratulatons, you’ve just proven it wrong. All wine shipments must be ordered, paid for, and signed for by someone aged 21 or over. No exceptions.
What if I’m not around to sign for the shipment?
- We highly recommend using a business address when ordering, to ensure that a person aged 21 or over will be present to sign for this package. If not, the shipper (UPS and FEDEX) will attempt to deliver the package two more times, usually leaving a notification after the third attempt with a number for you to call to arrange delivery options. If none of that works, we’ll step in and contact you to resolve the sitchee-ation.
What if I am visibly intoxicated when the package arrives?
- You will not be allowed to receive it. Seriously. That’s the rule, fool. You’ve been advised.
Can I send wine as a gift?
- Yes, as long as the person signing for the package is 21 years of age.
Fine Print (if not fine prose)
- Winery is the seller of record. Wine.woot.com is acting as the agent for the consumer in all transactions. All state and federal laws are adhered to in the marketing of this wine.
(content shamlessly ripped from http://wine.woot.com/WhatIsWoot.aspx on 7/26/07)